It went like this...

Daddy said
"If you argue too much when you're 5 years old, when you turn 6 your hair will turn yellow."

Bubba said
"No it won't."

Daddy said
"Yes it will. I saw it happen to a girl."

Bubba said
"Oh yeah, what girl?"

Daddy said
"A girl I used to know."

"What was her name?"
"Beulah"
"That's a made-up name. Where did she live?"

This would have gone on for hours had Sy and I not started laughing so hard we cried. You cannot pull the wool over Bubba Lou's eyes. No matter how hard we try to convince her chocolate is made of broccoli, or blueberries are just big rain drops, she never believes us. And I mean NEVER. It's impossible to fool her, she has a natural, built-in bullshit sensor (and she's happy to call you on it.) She knows what she knows and we cannot convince her otherwise.

She's going to grow up to interrogate prisoners. People will beg her to stop. They will confess all their sins just to shut her up. I can only imagine what's going to happen when she turns 13.

Sy and I have said (as I'm sure any parent of a girl has) that all you need to do to get prisoners or terrorists to confess is put them in a locked room with a few pre-teen/teenage girls (friends or not, doesn't matter) and only give one of them a cell phone. Set it to receive only, text only, no calls. People will give up anything to get out of that room.

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Am I the only person sick and tired of seeing kids clothes covered in Hannah Montana, Elmo, and Dora? My daughter likes t.v., and I let her watch some. Not every day, not every week even, but yeah, she knows who Dora is (not Hannah M., thank goodness.) Will I let her wear Dora, Cinderella, and Ariel on everything she owns? No. Yes, she does have a couple of t-shirts with Tinkerbell and a couple of princesses (thanks to a trip to Disneyland I took a few months ago.) Mum got her a princess beach chair. That's where it ends. I wont' let Dora on my little girl's sunglasses or shoes, I won't buy her a skimpy bikini with the little mermaid on it.

Yeah, let's talk about little girl's bathing suits! I bought Bubba two very conservative tankini's from One Step Ahead. SPF50, covered her belly and back, didn't fall off her shoulders, but easy to pull down to go pee. These swimsuits are pretty big on her (the tops are okay but the bottoms would almost fit me), so I was in a major department store the other day looking for something smaller and on sale to get us through the rest of summer. I couldn't find a single toddler's one-piece bathing suit that wasn't cut with a "bra" top and low back, and every two piece looked like a miniature of mine (pretty skimpy.) Since when do 3 year olds need sexy swimwear? Don't we need to cover up their delicate skin, while still letting them play in the water? And why can't they sell one without a cartoon character on it?

I know every major retailer offered conservative 1 and 2 piece swimwear earlier in the season (didn't I buy some?), but I really think it's disgusting that what I found is even offered. I mean, really, do pedophiles really need encouragement? I'm sorry if I'm way up on a soapbox here, but toddlers in skimpy bikinis are not cute. Let's let our kids be kids, not mini-adults. They grow up too fast all by themselves anyway.